by Leo Wiles
07 February 2014
Being raised to be kind, thoughtful and super accommodating, I have the hardest time saying no. Especially to friends who just want a quick media release, advertorial, article or bio written. Work for free? Umm, sure. (Pushover, right?)
The big question is: how do you stand your ground and say no to mates rates or writing for free without wondering if you’re jeopardising the friendship?
Firstly, check out this handy flowchart – a big version of our pic above – in which Jessica Hische takes you through the minefield of working for free in general. If that doesn’t help, head over to David Thorne’s site, 26b/6 for a giggle at Simon’s Pie Charts.
Secondly, stop feeling guilty. It’s okay to say no. Remember a quick, polite ‘Thank you for thinking of me, but unfortunately I’m not able to help with that’ is a lot fairer and easier than a long winded apology down the track when paid work has taken precedence and it is no longer possibly to fulfil the request.
Thirdly, recommend someone great who can do the job for them.
But what about those friends who refuse to take no for an answer? Who insist that it’s such a small job, that it’ll only take up an hour of your time, yada yada.
The real problem is, what that hour is worth (insert your hourly rate or word rate here). So price it for them and or reiterate in marketer Chris Brogan’s words: ‘Thank you. It’s great that you feel so passionately about me participating. I am so backed up with other priorities that I just can’t commit to this and deliver it for you. I’d rather say no now than say ‘I’m sorry’ later. I hope you understand’.
Because the chances are that a) it won’t be the only time they ask, and b) it’s taking you away from sourcing and doing paid work!
Putting yourself first and learning how to say no firmly and fairly has other benefits too. Not only does it set the boundaries and stop you feeling resentful, those people who have a tendency to ask too much, or offer too little, are going to have a newfound respect for you and what you do. Or, they’ll just stop asking. Either way, it’s a win, win.
Have you ever been put in an awkward position by a friend who wanted you to work for free? How did you handle it?
